You fell in Love with… Thank God it’s Over!

It’s true, before ending with our prince charming we all have kissed a few frogs and those who say they haven’t, well they are lying!

In this blogpost, I decided to share with you a few of the typical men you will one day fall in love with. You will not only regret them, but look back at and laugh at how gullible you were to fight for their love.

By all means, this is not an autobiography. Apart from a few hands-on experiences, it is mostly friends and acquaintance’s stories.

1- The Fuck Boy.

This is the number one asshole every girl will encounter and be manipulated by. Do not judge the girl. She is hopelessly looking for love and easily believing his promises of a future together. His aim is only to get into her pants.He will come up with several excuses when approached by the status of the relationship and take his distances once she starts being clingy. Surprise surprise, when he will eventually have a girlfriend and leave you in disbelief over that fact. But a fuck boy remains a fuck boy. Pray God that you came out of his grip not too harmed.

ps: He will contact you again after his break up. Don’t become one of those “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me” quoters. Just move on (away) from him.

2- The Commitophobe (#wordbymoi).

This gentleman (because yeah he generates that vibe) will ask you for a date, take you out to dinner, drinks and integrate you within his circle of friends. You will play house after a few months of being together. It’s a no brainer, he is the One. You’ve already planned you engagement a year+ later but,Surprise! Surprise, he breaks up with you. He is not ready. He never promised you anything. It was all in your head. You think about it and your realize that he is saying the truth indeed. He never talked marriage.

ps: You weren’t his One and trust me no one is either for the few years to come. Thank God he booted you out before that one year turned to two or three, in vain.

3- The Bipolar.

I am not sure if the title fits for this one, let me know if you find a better word for the person I am going to describe next. Before you started being too serious, he was openminded, generous, welcoming and embracing of your friends. Once the relationship tumbled into serious mode (after a few months) he completely changed. He became jealous of your friends, those same ones he met and enjoyed a couple of drinks with. You kissed your girls night out goodbye instantly. Your wardrobe became too skimpy for his likes. He started patronizing you and mistook his role of bf to father figure. The relationship ended because you just couldn’t continue with this new version of X.

ps: In my opinion, get away as soon as those traits come out of your boyfriend. You do not need a 21st century version of Khomeini in your future.

4- The condescending One.

You will never understand how you came to be in a relationship with this one. On paper he is perfect; same background, same religion, class and status. Your parents mingle within the same circle and well know one another too. Eventually you succumbed after a couple of dates into becoming his gf. For the wrong reasons. The latter being too good on paper than anything else. He doesn’t acknowledge you as a person, as his second half, only as the future trophy wife. He feels at ease in disrespecting you and your aspirations are null. He permits himself into acting this way because coming from a Middle Eastern society, women are desperately looking for their future husband based on these above mentioned points which, praise the Lord, you two have, so be merry and shut up. He abuses you emotionally. After a few months and many given chances you both give up. It just isn’t meant to be, pen & paper aside.

ps: It is a shame but it goes without saying, don’t settle for the one that will make your family and community happy. Go for the one that make YOU happy.

5- The Cheater.

He lacks self confidence. He has an emotional instability that dates back to his family dynamics. Oedipus’s complex much? Add to that; He is the player that suddenly turned saint when he met you. He wants to marry you. Shows you his materialistic accomplishments and offers you security. He takes you out and shows you off to everyone. You feel like a Queen. No you are the Queen. Now you peasants can become jealous. But we left out one thing here; the joke’s on you. You are a victim of his manipulative behavior. You are just a number, the xx-enth victim of his mind games. His goal? Well nothing at all. Life is a game for him. Get out of the field.

ps: He is a baller. And like that he is going to bounce in and out of your life if you permit it. Move on already and thank your prayers he’s on to his next victim.

 

It’s sad to know that there are many other types of relationships in which women fell and fought hard to keep for the wrong reasons.

Yes we have loved such men, and yes we imagined our future with them. However, I believe that God played a big role in teaching us lessons from such union and set us back to life in order to know whom to wait for.

Have you found your other half yet?

Trust me, you will…

xo

Instagram; the Unsolved Mysteries.

Disclaimer:  A couple of years ago I wrote a post about digital influencers, though it sparked anger on a couple of them that reversed it on my state of mind (whatever), I just want to warn anyone and everyone before hand that this post is about no specific Instagram user, so hold down your horses!

I will go straight into the subject and point out several things I have come to notice on IG without fully grasping its meaning/point.

1-  Everyone is a self- proclaimed public figure. What? Why? How? and what do you do in life Mr?Miss?Mrs??  Ok, Chill people… next

2- “Watch this space”. I am watching it. I follow you remember? I even turned the notifications on (again, remember that spam roll you went on to make us follow you religiously…) I am watching your space, you’d better post something relevant or else your space will be void of my watching..

3- The InstaStory/ Snapchat retro glasses. Seriously, go buy a pair please and enough with the fake plastered one..

4- Animalistic instincts? Enough with the deer/dog and now a new specie up and going around your head, although I see the resemblance with the real you (for most). Just enough already..

5- Customized hashtags anyone #Xloves, #Ylisting, #Ztravels . I don’t see the point as hashtags are considered to be a shortcut into finding a niche from around the world in one place blabla yet when you click on these specific customized nonsense, you sense that its the person who has created them living that bubble in his head. 

6- To those who post rarely yet when abroad > You traveled. Great. Why are we going to endure the spam that comes with it on our feed. We got it you are in #XTravel, #YinDubai .. oh look we infiltrated the above point here. You traveled, thats great, go enjoy your destination instead of it online, fully edited as well. 

7- Unnecessary comments such as “I love you” “Miss you”. From the looks of your social (media) life you were together two days ago. WTF? lucky you #Blessed #FriendshipGoals 

8- The new trend > Live videos. Take a chill pill, or at least go live doing something interesting. 

9- InstaStory dilemma. Its supposed to be a story, hence not a one picture posting. That’s what an IG profile is all about my dear.

10- Those with two profiles > one public and one private for friends and family. I wonder what is posted in the private one when all is already in the open in the public one? One of those mysteries, you don’t say…

11- The dedication to fans post celebrating Xk followers. Should we pat you on the back for the workload done? or the internet card in your wallet?

12- Those accounts with only selfies and quotes as captions. You, sweetheart, are unfollowed pronto.

13- Quotes and only quotes. You know there are specialized IG profiles for that. At least, implement what you are preaching sister.

14- Oh wait, I am done… Do you have any other points that puzzle you about Instagram ?

please do share it with me… and I hope that no one took this too seriously to the point of bashing me with comments…

Have a great week everyone and stay dry from all that rain!!!

xo

ps: this nice featured pictured was taken randomly from the www when using a specific hashtag for exploration…. no way!!!! 

Never let a person get comfortable disrespecting you!

Follow my blog with Bloglovin

“The more chances you give someone the less respect they’ll start to have for you. They’ll begin to ignore the standards that you’ve set because they’ll know another chance will always be given. They’re not afraid to lose you because they know no matter what you won’t walk away. They get comfortable with depending on your forgiveness. Never let a person get comfortable disrespecting you”.  

I stumbled on this quote the other day on my friend’s IG profile. I liked it and here we are several days later the content still on my mind, pondering and decided hence to share with you all some of my thoughts on the subject matter. But first;

In this new age of virtual insanity, it has become very difficult for single ladies out there to compete with one another and meet gentlemen. The easiness of the swipe and like button, DM’s and private Facebook messages has further let some of your guards down and make you behave in ways acceptable by mainstream media. On a moral standard, I deem such action unacceptable to you, a single lady, first and foremost.

Social media has shaped people to act on a whim because as I mentioned it earlier, a silent agreement has hatched way to people think it is ok to sext with a random stranger while in a relationship with another, message a late night booty call and get away with it while no party pays attention to the nonexistent next day follow up / call. There are many other examples but I do not need to pinpoint them all, right?

Now I know you are going to ask me, what is the point of all that I mentioned above, to do with the quote at the beginning of my blog post. Take what I am saying as a prerequisite, as what made way for men to be comfortable at disrespecting us. Social media (and everything virtual) is behind the malfunctioning experiences we have with the opposite sex and how we portray ourselves to our love conquests. I repeat: Relationships are being based on how we portray ourselves vis- a- vis social media. If we are okay with casual hook ups and guys not asking about us the next day then we are doing great with the ongoing trend. We are unconsciously not respecting ourselves, hence, we are paving way for men in getting comfortable disrespecting us every way possible. Social standard has stooped to its lowest and to be honest I don’t know till when we are going to let self respect partake in this affair.

For those sucker for a meaningful relationship, a fairy tale love (yes it does exist!!) stop accepting less in order to maintain a half ass (boy) man. If he doesn’t show interest in you on the first date and ask for a second one, just delete his number from your phone. It’s either there or not (the mutual attraction). Do not accept being the after-a-month second date. Trust me, if he likes you he wouldn’t have waited that long to see you again. If you feel that the person you are out having drinks with is only interested in casual sex and not bending towards #TeamRelationship, shorten your outing. You don’t need to waste your time, nor I believe you are looking to make new friends (remember we are all here for #TeamSayNoToHookUps). To those fixated on a crush whom you dated a couple of times but never got being exclusive, just stop making excuses for his lack of specificities and move on already. I bet 100$ he is waiting to have you in bed and hop to the next one. And last but not least, if you did give in to him not once but twice and thrice, still not being exclusive, then you can kick “respect” and “relationship” out of the window bye. You are now labeled as fuck-buddies. Ha! A label indeed. A slap in the face would be, for him to become exclusive with another woman. Girl you were just the “femme de passage” till he found the one with higher standards and self respect.

The way men treat you is based on the way you see yourself and treat yourself. Whatever image you are portraying to the outside world is how men will scrutinize you, enquire about you and then based on all the above approach you. You need to be headstrong in this dog eat dog world and set yourself on a pedestal. Forgiving once on one hand is ok however succumbing to social pressure and kissing your self- respect goodbye, will never get you the crown and the King you have long been awaiting for.

Are you worthy of a crown or becoming one of the pack follower?

That is for you and only you to decide.

X.O

ps: and don’t forget, it only takes one slip to make the cards all go tumbling down ….

(The image I used was randomly chosen off the internet – I don’t know who the artist is).

Exes; those that cant be tamed.

disclaimer: Remember that ex you couldn’t live without? Well look at you, living and shit!!

Ex, is a word we are all too familiar with because, yeah, we all have a minimum of one in our drawer (if you don’t have an ex, then girl, have you been living under a rock?). Kitchen Drawer? Closet? Cabinet? Hell any restrained rectangular shaped space would do, as long as it doesn’t open by mistake (that cabinet holding all those old tupperware would do). So within these space you would toss an ex or two and try never to slide the door open, and if, God forbid, those damn sized tups’ burst the door open, shut it back firmly and tightly. You do not need an old junk when you have collected new gadgets in the cabinet next door. Why am I comparing exes to in-animated object? Well do I need to remind you what they talk behind our back to their home boys? Guess not, so tups they shall remain. And between us, sometimes they do deserve that adjective…

So I am writing about this topic because as a woman I relate to those who are weak when their ex tries to catch up with them out of the blue on a Tuesday afternoon, season being winter at best (you know in winter everyone is relatively in a hibernating mode and seeks his selfish comfort). I am reaching out to those women who are in doubt of themselves when an ex pops back in the picture. I am reaching to the women who I am warning not to cave back in. I admit and its human nature, I caved in and so did you. And we most probably learnt our lesson I know I did. 110%.

A decade ago we would have given our bone marrow to our partner. A decade ago, we were ready to be tied down and faithful to his (sorry) ass. We were patient and caring to his mood swings and depressive state of mind. We were taking care of his every whim. We put our 200% into the relationship only to be given the boot because he was not ready to settle down. Picket fences and all that shebang. We grabbed our hearts in our own hands, a few teardrops here and there for a couple of weeks and we moved on. Apparently, men (boys, to be more precise) do not move on as easily as we thought they did. When he came back, we gave him the benefit of doubt and rekindled the relation. Only to have the same problems resurface and ended with another break up in our hands. Not the fairy tale wedding we were imagining, nope. Flash forward ten years, give or take, and you have EX trying to infiltrate your life again. Apparently you turned out to be the one who actually did M.O.V.E  O.N. and you’re happy and you know it (clap your hands!!!). Ok, sorry I’m being too merry about this, I just felt like tuning, its the season to be jolly, lalalala you know!! (ok apparently you don’t, i’ll stop).

When a person becomes an EX, that word not just labels him, it defines the boundaries and sets the tone for any further relationship. An EX is a person that was once close to your heart. A person you shared everything with baring in mind of a possible future together. However, the WE became EX and your roads diverged. For the better, trust me. When an ex pops back and tries to cave you back in, try not to remember the good things. Remember the bad things. Remember why things never worked out. Remember the tears. Remember the broken promises. Remember the lies. Remember the drama. Do not set yourself good enough for the promises. Do not be content with his just words. Do not fall for the petty act. Do not fall again because of your pure heart. Do not fall because you think that he is the only one out there for you. Do not fall for the comfort of the relationship. Do not fall back into his comfort zone. Do not fall back because you are scared of any future uncertainties. Do not fall back into his arms because of the society’s pressure. NO!! You deserve better. No. You deserve the best. And the best is not hidden in that EX. It is hidden in your future. And that kind of future awaits you. That kind of Love is out there. Do not settle for less. Trust me (again).

There is a french saying that goes like this “Chasse le Naturel, Il retourne au galop” (shoo away human nature, it comes back naturally)and that is what happens slowly yet surely.

Now let’s toast to those who put their clingy exes in the in-animated tupperware closet and drink a couple of bubbly to the every woman in us!

Chin (up) chin (up)!

xo

 

 

Drunk Texting Anyone?

Whether we wanna admit it or not we all have drunk texted someone in the past. To those who do not wanna admit to this very normal inebriated behavior, here are a few of the drunk texts you might have received in your life time;

  • What’s up?

Generally you receive this type of two worded texts on any given weekend after the wee hours. Let’s say on a Saturday at 3.30 am. Surely you don’t expect me to believe that your ‘friend’ texted so as to inquire about your health. If he wanted to join you on your outing, trust me you would have received that text prior 10 at night.

  • From your ex?

This one is the best message you can receive especially after a bad breakup initiated by the gentleman in question. This can only mean that you are in his thoughts (yeah even if he is drunk). Don’t they say, truth comes out of a drunken tongue ? (or something like that!?)

  • Wrong messages?

It is only the day after that you dread holding your phone and going through the texts and calls of the night before. Apart from the above mentioned drunk texts sent and received you will notice that you might have sent a couple to strange numbers which to be honest I prefer to the incomprehensible ones to friends. Gh%!^~*BJK!!!!! right?!!!

  • Blanking ?

One of my favorite is ‘accidentally’ sending a blank text to your crush. Worse case scenario you can blame the phone for sending it by mistake. Damn you technology!!! (Just try to make sure when explaining face to face one day to not having your phone locked with a password!).

  • FB messenger too?

You have an infinite block list on your phone? So do I. But when there is a will, there is a way; Facebook messenger! Like Trump said it over and over again > What a mess!!! Let’s just say that I uninstalled that option from my phone. Trust me you do not wanna receive a drunk text when out and about, from someone who has noticed that he cannot reach you through proper phone channels (whatsapp, plain text messaging..).

There is no shame in drunk texting. We all did it. We might not have been proud about it but our sole excuse is that we learn from our mistakes. Drunk texting is an excuse when you are in your twenties. But when you have entered your mid 30s and still getting drunk on weekends and texting incomprehensibly then I can only manage to tell you this : You are a pathetic loser. Get a life boy!

Zzzzzzzzz……..

 

 

What they omit telling you about Lebanon.

They love to brag about everything that is cliche about the country; the beach, the snow, the different sects living within, the rooftop parties, and blablabla…. but most importantly they omit to describe to you the truth.

The truth that every Lebanese knows about his 10452m2 heaven on earth but dare not say and sometimes shuns away from.

Bullet pointed below are few of these points based on reality fact checks:

  • First of all, and most importantly for anyone coming from abroad, the country stinks. Yes it stinks. If you do not believe me, please do travel for a few months, come back and tell me what hits you first thing you set foot outside the airport. A lousy stench. That’s what slaps your nostrils in the face.
  • Second of all, we all agree that Lebanon is no longer the Switzerland of the Middle East. Neither, can we be all high and mighty by thinking that we are better than the UAE. We are not. We are by far, worse than any of the Arab countries we so love to look down on. Take a mere example of how they abide by their rules (ex:transportation/road system/labor) and societal norms, while we live like pigs by disrespecting the law every chance we get or bending the rules to suit our livelihood and further trashing our already (literally) trashed country by throwing tissue out of our car.
  • The social rules and regulation set aside, this country is not only polluted, its citizen lacks hygiene. By the latter, I mean you cannot walk down the street without stumbling on dog poop. You just cannot have an enjoyable walk because you are too busy staring at the ground. To all dog owners out there who do not clean up behind their four legged furs I have one thing to say: I hope you slide and fall on dog poop next time you are out with ‘Vanilla’ / ‘Vodka’ (yes, because c’est pas cool de donner un nom commun a son chien-chien ).
  • Men are pig? Yeah maybe.. but Arab men are far worse. There is an alarming frustration /sexual tension among men from this part of the world. I think all women living in Lebanon will agree with me that one cannot go out in public wearing as she pleases without being harassed. Before you jump down my throat, I am not talking to the fashionistas who wear their mini shorts and parade from one place to another in their cars hence cannot be subjected to such degrading behavior. I am talking about women who prefer to walk their way around like me and although wearing your basic jeans and t-shirt or knee length shorts are subjected to ogling eyes and orgasmic interjections from men (young/old alike). Do not tell me you haven’t witnessed slow moving cars and the generosity of drivers letting you cross the street while their eyes focusing on your Bs (boobs & butts ladies!).
  • I think one thing that I have not, till this day, understood, is the popularity of the New Range. Range Rover, New Range, whatever the name and model, I think you visualized the car. Lebanese love this car. No wait. They worship this car. This mean of transportation equals status, class and wealth. Oh how I would love to slap some sense into this visual cliche. This car might be worth 150,000$ when bought the latest year of production, full option and brought from the nest (Europe), however I have seen so many buying them second (if not third) hand from car dealerships and on installment (end price say 25,000$) just so they can parade on the ill-made roads of the city. Still acting like a snob because of your vehicle? Well think again, my mechanic (with all due respect) has just bought his NR and I am pretty sure he is not as wealthy as he wants to show / be. Your car is so overrated!
  • Open minded? Free? No we are not open minded. Nor are we free. We like to show that we are. Thank God we are not oppressed like the citizens of the KSA. But we are not open minded nor are we free to act as we please. If its not the stone age laws that sets us back, it is the social norm/ mentality that does.

I don’t know about you but a caricatural image of a sort has formed in my mind when re-reading this post. I am not trying to mock the country. I am simply stating facts and the truth of every day real life in Middle Eastern Lebanon.

Tell me you haven’t felt, witnessed and thought about the above mentioned points.

Be honest.

xo

 

Lebanese Bitches Be Like.

images

Lebanese women you might have been voted one of the most beautiful species in the world thanks to your mediterranean roots (and your  surgeon) however most of you come with that bitchy attitude plastered on your forehead  like a necessary tag price.

I find it hard to find one or two gorgeous creatures INSIDE out. There might be humble personalities along with all that plastic out there but tell me what are the odds of that?

Lebanese Bitches are those who do not have any positive support system towards their girlfriends, (close or not), who do not respect female sisterhood ethics system and most importantly who will crush any woman standing along their path and goals.

I have been blessed after all those passing years and the ups and downs I faced with my girl friends (who have exited my life) to have surrounded myself with hard working women who empower each other and share the same vision and support system towards one another.

Girls like that are hard to find and once established a strong bond with, advised to hold strongly and dearly to the heart.

The following are three of the Lebanese typical bitches that roam our society and all of you should be aware of;

  • The hidden jealous types; those are the ones who will never ever acknowledge to you straight to your face and in the open their true feelings towards anything and everything you do. They will advise you bad styling advice and wrong comforting words about your relationship status (break ups/hook- ups and crushes).
  • The competitive ones; those will envy your ambition, your drive and your passion towards your projects/jobs and prospective plans. Word of advice: Never share everything with anyone.
  • The breakers; those are the worse you can ever possibly bump into. They do not want you to be happy. They will do the impossible to break up your couple/marriage if they have set their eyes on your man. Being the mistress for them in these situations is not a shame even if it means that everyone knows that the man they are after is using them for sex only.

I have only listed the above mentioned characteristics that sum up perfectly each and every biatch that crosses our path.

The New Year is -1 Day and I am sure all of you have set your priorities straight for what is to come in 2016. Whether you are planning your next project, relocating to a fresh start, stepping up in your relationship status, just take a moment and ponder if you have or suspect having a certain girl friend that fits the above. If you do, then delete her from your life. They might be charming to your face and rightfully by your side now but you never know when that bomb will finally tick off.

Till then I wish each and every one of you a Happy New Year 2016 blessed with love, health and success.

D-1 unfolding the Madness & Magic in Me & You.

xo