Social Media vs Your Life!

Disclaimer: Social media addiction is spending too much time on social media platforms, such as Facebook, twitter, instagram and its likes, that it is taking its toll on your ‘real’ personal life. It is taking gratification virtually on your accomplishments and approval from mostly strangers on your endeavors. Some people snap out of it after a time but most drown further this rabbit hole.

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I would have never imagined one day that technology is going to over rule mankind. With the years passing by, technological devices became an imminent part of our daily life; not a day goes by without any new app being launched and taken over by many social media aficionados!

Social media platforms are fun and a way to connect with friends, families all around the world. They are also a worldwide venue for people sharing common interests, to exchange pictures, thoughts and rewarding positive encouragement to one another.

The problem however arises when people let virtual communication take over their lives and real relationships. Moreover, the real problem is when people fall into competition with one another over social media popularity.

Let’s face it, social media is creating tension among friends and online business competitors more than its adding value in their respective lives. I have witnessed many unimaginable twists and plots within group of friends and online bickering among outlets that it left me voicing my thoughts on the topic.

Humans fall into two groups; those who are mature enough to dismiss any negativity and stay focus on their business and this other group (my favorite) who go out of their way to prove to their surrounding (and fans) that they are all that jazz!

According to studies, when we need a break, our brain craves for social attention. Unfortunately, people take on interacting socially a click away instead of calling their friends and meeting up over coffee or dinner.

Do you know how many messages I receive whether on whatsapp or a comment under one of my posted pictures “Miss you, lets meet up next week” and how many do not follow up on their wish? 3/5 for the first, 0 on the second. I question myself; is it a lack of motivation? laziness or just waiting for the other person to make the effort? I know that when a person tells me he wants to meet up with me soon and sets a date to call me so as to confirm, I await and when the call does not go through (not once but a few times) I just give up on that person and limit him/her to social media interaction. When I miss someone and do the first step into expressing my emotions towards him and when receiving reciprocity, I just send that quick sentence of “hey am passing by tonight after work to see you” and that is how I maintain the few left genuine friends in my life.

On the other hand, I mentioned the tension that arises from social media presence within group of friends and businesses alike. Both relationships, though not similar in form, share in common one thing: Competition. People by nature tend to be envious and jealous from one another (a feeling that I have never myself felt towards any) hence backstabbing each other on social media discreetly. Whether its following your friends’ friends after one encounter, starting a virtual friendship behind someone’s back, copying your friend’s instagram concept & picture settings. Some people are discreet whereas most are tacky and straight in your face.

Most businesses I have realized are not professional; following one another instead of getting inspiration and encouragement, they tend to criticize each other in subliminal messages. Yes life is hard and getting harder by the day, however pulling anyone down for self- gratification is plainly and simply fucked up!

If you feel good about your self, have built up an impenetrable wall of self confidence, you do not need to use the above mentioned tools to mark a territory on a virtual platform. Instead use all that energy and build your real life presence among society. Make a name, plant a face and have that ‘je ne c’est quoi’ to leave a good memorable impression on those you meet daily. 

Have a great weekend everyone!!!!

xo

ps: I am active on social media platforms yes, however I do not let that part of my life take its toll on my whole being! and now off to enjoy the rest of the day!!!

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Lebanese Society at its Best- Happy ‘In’dependence Day!

When I say that I love my country, I only want to make sure that you understand that I am only including the natural sceneries, the mild weather, the friends that make it bearable to live in and THATS IT. That aside, I do not appreciate what Lebanon is turning into, going from being the Paris of the Middle East to a state lived by a back warded mentality of selfish goons.

What makes a country is its citizens. Lebanese citizens are ambiguous & ridiculous at best. They long for a certain lifestyle yet implement another traditional mindset in their everyday action. The following are a few of the type of Lebanese that I have encountered within my surrounding that either make or break Lebanon. Honestly they mostly break it, but thats for you to judge.

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1- The 5% billionaires.

I know what you are going to say. Those are the people that have built businesses and own multinational enterprises, hiring as much as 50+ employees and hence providing indirectly to many families. Yet those are the people that would care less about what is affecting civil society in general. Its another thing if it were to hit their wellbeing or bank accounts. How many of you have encountered young adults from these families who only cared for their latest purchases, whether its the latest car or bag, rather than society’s uproar against governmental corruption or the garbage crisis? Those are the people that live by the slogan of “joie de vivre” whenever there is an explosion and innocent lives are shattered or protests and roads are closed, leaving them clustered at home. Their motto is to continue with their night outs trying to convince everyone that no one should let factors out of their reach affect their lives. Their motto is to “be strong and show them perpetrators that they will not let anything affect my social life”. Offsprings from such families are a disgrace for the future of the country as they portray a shallow image of the population at large.

2- The “bullshitters” 

The funny part is that those are the ones that constantly nag about the corrupt aspect of the government, the raising prices of just anything (food, clothing, outing), the implementation of a traffic law with exorbitant fines and the garbage infested streets since the unresolved garbage crisis. However those are the ones that will continue voting for the same leaders if they had the chance (see the parliament has adopted anew trend of re-electing itself any chance given), will continue getting loans for unnecessary purchases, will almost break the traffic law on a daily basis by double parking or not wearing a seatbelt and disregard the recycling campaigns because they cannot be bothered sorting out their trash in different compartments.

3- The “victims”

Those are the citizens that are stuck with this system. They are; owners of small shops, governmental employees, fresh graduates stuck with passionless jobs. Whichever their status in the workforce, they all share a similar point; they can not wake up one day and just call it quits. They are stuck with their position or businesses because they do do not have a better opportunity elsewhere in the market, better yet abroad. They are victims because, contrary to the sharks managing their state of affairs, they cannot come down to “playing it dirty” to get their way. Three words; they have morals. Trust me when I say that those are the ones that go through shit loads of pain and challenges just so that they can survive daily in this country. Apart from their upbeat morale, you will come to notice that this category of people is the nicest and genuine of them all, selfless and generous despite their limited means.

 

To be honest with you there are many people who make or break a country. Concerning my city, I have come up with the above mentioned general types without being too specific, leaving you, my readers, to brainstorm and remember people from your own encounters. Within each category, I am sure a face (if not several) popped instantly. I don’t know about you, but living among people who careless about society in general (vs their own pockets) and others who have become way too deeply nonchalant about the future of their current hometowns, made me after years of my return to Lebanon three steps further into returning to my civilized adoptive country. Am I less patriotic? yes I am. I have come to terms with judgmental opinions and cliche snaps about Lebanon. Few are those who are fighting for the well being of their country. Fewer are following them every passing months. As long as the citizens established in this city do not make a simple effort (let’s take an obvious example here) of ‘abiding by a traffic law’ without hiding behind the matter of fact statement ‘there are still bribes going on so why give the government pleasure of filling its pockets’, major changes will not settle into their mindset.

Not now. Not ever.

Maybe their grandchildren’s three generation down the road will…

But again I doubt….

Happy ‘In’dependence Day everyone!

 

A Year Ago vs Today; the Last chapter of Mourning.

Disclaimer: This might be one of, if not, the most personal post I have ever published on my blog. I might have been blessed to be surrounded by love & comforting friends, but the main strength relies on oneself only, Only you can survive a tragic loss. Only you can make the change.

 

A year and 17 hours ago,  I woke up from a nightmare unfolding into a reality; I had just lost the most important person in my life; the man that I had spent the last 33 years with living under the same roof, the man that had given me the best life I could possibly imagine of and the man that showered me with an unprecedented unconditional love day and night. In a split second it all came to an end.

Everyone assumed that I was going to break and fall into oblivion. Everyone was expecting a meltdown. Everyone. Even I.

The first year is always the worse (everyone said). You spend birthdays, Christmas, New Year and some important commemorations with that one person absent. You shred some tears (even choking sobs) on those dates, looking back at old pictures. Pictures and selfies you will not be able to renew years from now; comparing the eventual growth of the persons involved, physically, and capturing emotions regarding the moments you are experiencing together. It is normal to shy away from society; everyone is understanding however the problem arises when you start getting comfortable in your new cocoon. A cocoon that on the long run will be harming you and only you. It will rise some concern within your family and close friends. Days will pass by, even months and you will turn into a walking zombie in your home, while everyone else is eventually moving on. Then one Day it will stop.

7 months later I woke up. I woke up and said yes to a dinner invite set by my close friend. I showered (no people no, I was showering everyday, please!) dressed and before leaving the house kept on repeating to myself that everything is going to be okay. I had a really great time (thank you for asking!) and decided to take my life back.

What I am trying to say is the following:

  • you will always feel the loss. you will always shred tears. you will never get over it or as everyone keep on pressing; ‘move on’.
  • you will have to bounce back to life.
  • can you imagine yourself sad and depressed for years to come? (I can’t)
  • as cheesy as this may sound, nor the person you lost would have liked to see you wasting your life like that on his/her expense.

A loss is a tragedy, mourning a fatality if not treated well. As I said before, if you do not take matters into your own hand while spiraling down the rabbit hole, the end of your life (not literally) would bite your ass sooner than you thought. The hand that was lent to you, grabbing you, will eventually slip and make your fall deeper down the hole. The light, while looking up the hole, will be fading to a point where you will be wishing you saw it back ‘full screen’.

Being strong under such circumstances is not easy. I never thought of myself as a strong person. This tragedy proved to me, that not only am I strong, but I can face any obstacle thrown my way with determination and assiduity. That every problem has a solution. That it is not the end of the world. That life is only lived once. That he is watching over me. That he is proud of me. That he is always going to be next to me. That he lives within me. That I am his legacy. And his legacy is ALIVE  with me.

I will always LOVE  you Dad..

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xo