The controversy of Amore!

What is love?

Does love exist?

Does love hurt? 

Will I ever feel it? Have i ever really felt it?

Do I want to re-experience it?


Those are few of the many questions that come through my mind whenever this subject is up, whether with my friends or myself. Well its easier to explain to a child where babies come from than dissect this concept.Everyone has his own notion defined from his/her experiences and feelings, and each one of us share experiences that are different from one another even though the similarities are great. i daresay the latter because sometimes friends tend to advise each other based on their own experience, although a thoughtful gesture, no one can be in your shoes to decide of your path. Sorry les amies but like my father tells us “vous etes majeur et vaccines” (you are of legal age and vaccinated) to decide of your destiny.

Now there are many levels of love as there are type of love, but I am not going to linger on both a lot, just point out a few that affect one’s “love”-ly path!

We all do remember our childhood love, right? Yes that innocent teenage crush we thought was the love of our life. Who would forget the longing of monday mornings just so to catch a glimpse of Him across the football field? The recess period, the hallway walk/crossings.. etc. Those were the days we were experiencing something beautifully disturbing and innocent.

Let us go further in time and to the university years. Those three/four years spent in an institution forging your future can at times forge your relationship on another level as well;  some people have met their future husbands/wives at university (although am not fond of any kind of commitment at such young age since two peoples’ level of maturity and certainty has not been moulded fully).

These are two of the many periods one passes through feeling the excitement of love, relationship and experience. Alas with love comes a ferocious feeling we all have experienced at some point in our lives; the heartbreak! Now before jumping into that miserable aspect let me share with you my personal opinion on this topic.

I want to admit to you (even knowing that you’d be all laughing) that I was a sucker for romance. I was one of those who believed that love conquers it all in the end, that when you pour your heart and soul into your emotions towards the opposite sexe, it will linger endlessly till death do us apart… (no people I am not one of those who likes to watch romantic movies) yet alas I learnt the opposite the hard way. Whoever advised Sonny and Cher that “love does not pay the rent ” (I got you babe – track) was damn right! 🙂

Lately (i-e since spring) I have been hearing a lot of disturbing stories of fall-outs, broken homes and once where passion existed, coldness conquered. I witnessed the divorce of a very dear friend of mine whose relationship with his ex-wife was everything I wanted to have one day. What i thought was perfect was, i guess, not just so… I have come to notice that a lot of people who have married solely for the purpose of being “in love” are facing trouble in paradise. Now I would have said a few months back that I would never let myself be in such a situation (firmly and assuringly) however when the unimaginable is happening, would i take the chance of being blinded by my emotions only? I guess not (and lets face it all my failed relationships might be a wake up call?).

Now do not get me wrong people, my heart has not turned ice cold! 🙂 I have loved with all my heart and I know I am capable of loving again. I want to feel love as much as I want to give love. But maybe this time around we should weigh the percentage of love against rationality more wisely. Everything at extreme is bad; whether loving only or being rational only. I have heard many times that passion dies with time (and I have seen it as well) and what we are left with is the mutual respect and tolerance for one another’s presence in this life. The mutual fondness takes the place of our emotions and does not change the level of care and appreciation for our other half’s presence in our life. Please do take the time and click on the link (copy paste it) below so as to read the interview of a 98 year old woman on love and relationship:

Because in the end we are sealing our love with a kiss till death do us apart.

marriage love



Author: Patyl-Astrid

"Be daring, be different, be impractical, be anything that will assert integrity of purpose and imaginative vision against the play-it-safers, the creatures of the common place, the slaves of the ordinary." Cecile Beaton

1 thought on “The controversy of Amore!”

  1. ”..this time around we should weigh the percentage of love against rationality more wisely.” I think this is the main point of the whole beautiful article I have read above. I personally do not repent loving irrationally before, I am happy that this made me, at my age now, learn from past mistakes and thus love once again…but rationally too!

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